I don't know if it's because school is getting ready to start again (my kids come tomorrow) or just because I'm about to *sob* exit my 20s.... but something is a little off. For whatever reason, I have piled one embarrassing moment on top of another over the course of the last week, and I need it to stop.
I like to imagine myself as a suave, cool, collected, urban do-it-all kind of girl... I'm a coach, a mom, a wife, a teacher... I have interests and am involved in various things.
Turns out, I'm just a bumbling, uncoordinated blob.
Ex. 1: K. happened to be in town last week around lunchtime and called to see if I wanted to meet him. Now, it just so happened that this was the day of our district wide meeting, for which we are supposed to look presentable, and I was wearing heels.
I love my heels and girly clothes, but I took a break from them this summer in favor of flip-flops and what K. calls my "mu-mus" -- or billowy, loose-fitting sundresses. In my effort to reacquaint myself with my grown-up clothes, I opted for one of my favorite pairs of shoes to make the transition less painful.
These shoes rock. Stiletto heels, leopard-print sandals. Not scary hooker sandals, mind you -- just cute summer sandals. Very versatile. Very much my taste. Love them.
Anyway, as we exited the building, I noticed that my belt -- a beaded brown tie-on kind of thingy -- is sliding down. For whatever reason, I cannot get the bleepity-bleep belt tight enough to stay up. (I think it's because it is made from glass beads.... it's definitely not because I'm some sort of waif who is too small for clothes.)
I was trying to keep up with Keith while at the same time inconspicuously removing myself from the belt. When I tried to step out of the belt as it slid down my hips, my stiletto heel caught in the hem of my knit gauchos.
Knit is stretchy, you know, but apparently not so stretchy that it would accommodate the distance between the hem and the ground. (Gauchos, for those that have no idea what I'm talking about, usually fall just below knee length.)
Instead, when gravity kicks in and forces me to put my foot down -- while the heel is still entangled -- the gauchos only stretched so far before sliding down my hips as well.
Yes, that's right. I'm standing in the middle of the sidewalk at a busy local eatery with my belt on the ground and my pants halfway to my ankles.
I mooned the entire east side of the building.
Well, technically, it wasn't a moon because I was wearing underwear (and nice ones, at that, thank heavens)... but really... it was as close as I ever want to be to showing my A.... well, at least, involuntarily. :)
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